That Floating Poo Was Far Too Meaningful! These Are the Television Letdowns of the Year.

Looking back, we consider the TV offerings of the past year, a handful of shows stand out not for their excellence, but for their notable failures. From awkward sequels to confusingly bad documentaries, here are the productions that had us utterly bewildered or just reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

How to start with this divisive follow-up? Burdened with dreadful writing, cringe-inducing character development (justice for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series struggled to find its footing. Briefly, as the final series began, it looked like it had finally found its groove. Then came an episode centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the creator announced this would be the final series. It concluded on a bum note; the lingering shot of Miranda’s toilet flooded with poo was just way too on-the-nose. Yet, viewers certainly had a hoot dissecting every single “wtf?” moment. And as Carrie – once again single – danced around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t release a little sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the least of this drama's issues. The subject of a very rare no-star review, it was hard to know where to begin listing the flaws. The hilariously wooden dialogue? The mind-numbing veneration of wealth and consumption? The seemingly wilful parade of cliches? Acting so poor they felt almost malicious? Let’s just say “all of the above” and never speak of this series again. However, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Given the legal troubles, domestic violence claims and fatherly failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not you’d really have known it from this three-part documentary which smirked its way at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive excess while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Rather, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this show might evoke should be saved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charismatic but dismissive narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Of course we understood it was ridiculous from the outset: a thriller about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure love for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One scarcely cared when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about giving up the ghost.

MobLand

Shady figures convening in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and wants its crime drama back.

Actually, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many look a little dated now, but at least they didn’t endure the embarrassment of having to indulge baffling dialects. But there were plenty of other issues. Primarily that it was just profoundly boring; a conflict over narcotics territory between various London picaresques which felt rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the extent to which she grinds the gears of certain performatively enraged commentators, it’s temptingly tempting to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into quaint homemaking as deliberate statements. But then you watch them and are compelled to concede that actually, they might have a point. It’s like watching a homeware magazine animated; a meme for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, sentimental sayings and forgettable crafting “hacks” you’ll not remember instantly. All supported by immense, mostly undeserved wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are clearly fascinating things to be said about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with vocation, identity, self-acceptance. But for whatever reason, this three-part series chose not to say them. Rather, the experience was akin to reading a marketing catalogue. She obviously has good reason to resent what she describes as her “miserable cow” image. But unfortunately, she didn’t do herself any favours with this guarded non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It should have been the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a famous star playing dead and a sharp-tongued personality managing her estate. What more could you want? As players competed, there was plenty of backstabbing and arguing. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too complicated to explain what precisely was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The series ended up smelling of a programme that was straining desperately to emulate something way beyond it.

Too Much

How do you follow a show that defined a generation? The pressure was enormous for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who arrives in London with a shattered romance. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, embodying Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very glossy and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of famous friends involved felt icky.

The Sketch Show Return

Not even good enough to be ‘patchy’.

Given the shrewd inclusion of gifted emerging comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a husk but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The writing room sketches, meanwhile, simply inspired the idea that they should probably have remained in there a bit longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely presented the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The material needed to be treated sensitively. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lurching from strangely jaunty, somewhat mannered farce to ultimately, real-life horror. Twisted? Arguably. A total mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We admire the star … but did we believe him playing the greatest maths genius since, a man so intelligent he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about government agencies targeting – and killing off – intellectuals honestly got more absurd by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality notorious for sexual escapades as she undertook her biggest feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we craved was far greater examination of her actual psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who appeared to drag her son out of the queue. What we got was horrific shots and absolutely no interrogation of her infamy whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a teenage daughter too.